fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
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