I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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