piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize