so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
