i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
