whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
