That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
