ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
