3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
my poor anus
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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