have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
he fucked my hip out of place.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
