bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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