I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
