her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
