Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize