Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
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