Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
