I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
