why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
