Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
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we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
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So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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