dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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