you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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