The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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