He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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