I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
i've created a new STD.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
