I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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