"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Randomize
