But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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