I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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