I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize