I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
