YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
