I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
