a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize
