He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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