I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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