Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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