Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Randomize
