i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
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we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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