Where are you?
In a non slutty way
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
