OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
