VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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