Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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