we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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