somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
