Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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