the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
