His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
