Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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