Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
