then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
